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Search begins for intelligent life in the White House


Mount Palomar, CA (CNBS) – A massive search has been launched by the American Astrological Survey Society.

Society Grand Whizzier, Dr. Syd Scorpio, said AASS members will be searching to determine either the color of the sky in Donald Trump’s world or the location of the planet from which he came.

“My first clue that he may not be from this planet was a casual remark by the president one day in the White House Rose Garden. He remarked how lovely the 'paisley sky' was that day,” Dr. Scorpio told CNBS.

With his apparent detachment from reality, Dr. Scorpio said many members think he might actually be from as far away as Pluto or the Ort Cloud beyond Pluto’s orbit.

“I’m inclined to agree. When you consider that the brightest object in the sky here on Earth is the Sun, but on Pluto the sun is a mere dot. Earth is hardly visible from Pluto 5.9 billion kilometres away.”

Dr. Scorpio went on to say, “no one, especially a world leader, would say or even think some of the things Trump says unless they were from another planet.” Mr. Trump’s perception of a paisley sky reinforces the view that he is from somewhere else, the astrologer said.


Another point that aroused Dr. Scorpio’s suspicion is his claim to be born in June. “That would make him a Gemini, two faced; says one thing then says the opposite. I really think we need to see his birth certificate, and we're talking the long form here. Was he actually born here on Earth?”

Officials from SETI, the institute searching for extra-terrestrial intelligence, declined to join the search project. “We’re looking for intelligent life and we don’t see the life-form they are studying (Trump) showing much intelligence.”

The SETI spokesman added, “we are hoping to find a life-form that is a little, well really, a lot more intelligent.”

Dr. Scorpio responded, “we understand SETI’s position, but we are driven by curiosity. Is Mr. Trump really from another planet, other than Russia, and if so, where is that planet and, if Mr. Trump is indicative, how in hell have they managed interplanetary travel?”

To fund their search, AASS has received commercial support from AOL Time-Warner’s HBO subsidiary. “HBO wants to know if that planet has cable or are stealing the HBO signal? Apparently they have Fox News,” Dr. Scorpio said


Members of the AASS have begun scanning Mr. Trump and the sky to attempt to identify indicators for astronomical follow up.

Jagdish Bahliwal​ is the Science and Technology editor for CNBS News

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